--> eyelash wishes

guy:

OMG… ur staying home on a FRIDAY night?

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

same

(Source: guy)

i’m so afraid of marriage like what if you marry someone and like have kids with them and then they decide they don’t love you anymore or something idk man but that shit is scary

(Source: hate)

"Relationship advice: Find someone who accepts you for the lazy piece of shit you are."

(via suchvodka)

(Source: quotecomedy)

playstation2chainz:

fun game to play at the movies: not bringing your fucking baby

perchu:

plasticbagvevo:

perchu:

my nose is cold

put it in the oven

ok

amoying:

shall i compare thee to summers day

u make me very sweaty and uncomfortable

(Source: amoying)

"Since birth,
I have been
defined
by numbers:
inches,
feet,
pounds,
grades,
percentages.
Does it ever
stop?"

Michelle K., Numbers.  (via gezell)

pupbutt:

why say nip slip when peek-a-boob is so much better

stability:

I wish my wallet came with free refills

(Source: stability)